Singular focus.


Seems to be a hot topic amongst the mamas in my life. We are no exception here. I was thinking as I was listening to him scream as he carried his new soccer goal all around the living room, hovering it over various balls, exclaiming “GOAL!”, that tantrums have happened since birth.

It’s not, oh shit he’s a year and a half and it’s too early for the “terrible twos”, it’s more like oh yeah, he fussed and cried when he was learning to roll over and sit and stand and walk and now it’s about games he wants to play that we obviously don’t know the rules of and God dammit get that tooth brush out of my mouth can’t you see I’m trying to figure out the plug to your ipod dock?!

Not that I have a clue how to handle this. I try to react with empathy. I find myself repeating, “It sounds like you’re frustrated buddy, how can I help you?” many, many times daily. I’m also keeping a level head around the last time he slept or ate so I don’t make him out to be the bad guy when it’s most likely that he’s hungry or tired on top of his frustration and determination to figure everything out.

I had to temporarily retire the green bouncy ball he got from his wonderful Aunt Tiffany. Apparently the only way to play with this ball is to bounce it, then kick it while still bouncing. What started out as fun quickly turned to angry mania as he was completely pissed at the ball while simultaneously holding onto it as if his very existence depended on it. Now it’s taking a time out in the laundry closet.

Here he is with the beloved green ball before the mandatory must kick the ball while it’s bouncing started.

As the shadows got longer, the mood turned. And yes, I know this is not a tantrum.

Yesterday I read about a “Big Feelings Box” and thought it was genius, although Ian might be a little young to grasp the concept fully. It contains a pillow to scream into or punch, paper and crayons to draw your “big feelings”, and bubbles to blow after taking deep breaths.

From what I’ve gleaned from other moms, this is only the beginning. Trying not to project but geez…think my only having one kid mantra is gonna be ringing in my head for awhile.

2 comments on “Tantrums

  1. Looks to me like he is working off excess energy and he expressions of frustration are just that. A tantrum would be much more than a cry or two. But you know him much better than do I.
    In the backyard, when he was here, he would work for an hour or closer to two before he gave me the signal he wanted to stop by kicking the ball twice in a row into the driveway. Then that game would be over and we would come inside and play on the porch. Hope this helps.

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